Life of a Stay at Home Mom
| February 22, 2012 | Posted by Karen under Helpful Tips, inspiration |
Today I’m going to jump off my normal blog path. It’s a hard thing for me to do. I tend to play it safe, so to speak. But I just feel led to write about this topic from my point of view. This post is about deciding to stay home with your little kids or send them to day care. It’s not about homeschooling vs school.
I recently read a blog post on Living Devotionally that really made me sad. First off, I have nothing against Katie. In fact, I enjoy reading her blog. And I completely understand and “get” what she is saying. I think that’s why I felt so burdened to write this post. I just couldn’t shake it out of my head! I mean the amount of moms that agreed with her on enjoying out of the home work more than being home with their kids really saddened me.
As a mom of 3 teens and 1 tween, I guess I’m writing this from the other end. I’ve gone through the storm and weathered it. I’m now on the other side of babyville and can look back with perspective.
So let’s rewind and go back several years. At one point I had a newborn, a 2 year old and a 3 year old. And then 2 years later another newborn. Trust me, I know and understand sleep deprivation. My newborn at the time nursed every 1 1/2 hours day and NIGHT and my 3 year old was a destructive tornado who loved to eat all things toxic. I remember being giddy and excited when I got 3 hours of sleep in a row one night!! I never had one of those babies that slept through the night. They were maniac nursers.
Like Katie, I relished nap time and bedtime. Although, I never felt guilty about that. My house was usually a mess. Dinner, umm let’s just say it was edible. I think all of this is very normal. I’m not sure any sane mom gets excited when her toddler wakes up from nap time.
What made me sad was that she felt she “bought into the lie that to be a good Christian mom I need to stay home, keep my house clean, plan out my meals and bake my own bread. I must homeschool my kids, with a well-thought out plan for each day, and I should enjoy it every step of the way.”
Honestly, I think most of us have felt that way to some degree or another. I used to feel that way. I actually went through a time where I sucked the joy right out of my home with my need to have everything perfect. My sweet husband came to me one night after I had gone on a tirade of vacuuming, and said he would rather have a messy house than an angry wife. He reminded me that they won’t be little forever and that the time is fleeting. He reminded me to take time to enjoy my babies. Play with them. Laugh with them. Cuddle with them. I mean are they really going to remember how clean the carpet was, or that you played with play-doh and had fun?
It makes me sad to see young moms get so wrapped in the “now” and loose sight of “tomorrow.” So focused on their desire for freedom and how going off to work will make it all better. Really?
To me that’s the lie. The house will still be dirty. The laundry will still pile up. The kids will still cry. The meals will still have to be cooked. It doesn’t go away just because you send them off and you get away from them. You have only a few short years with your babies before they head off to school. And believe me it may seem long now, but in a few years babyhood will be gone. You can’t get back all those moments the daycare worker shared with your child. You can’t get back all the “firsts” you missed. And I’m sorry, but no one, I mean no one, will ever love your child like you. But that’s our generation. The kids raised by daycare workers. Sad. Very sad.
Now before anyone gets mad and says, “I have to work!” I realize there are situations where it is a must. But let me tell you how we live so I can stay home. We decided early on that big houses, fancy phones, new cars etc. etc. weren’t as important as our kids. We have a “cozy” 3 bedroom house, ONE bathroom and 6, yes SIX people. My “new” van has 230,000 miles on it. And I don’t have an iPhone. You can now pick your jaws off the floor.
Does it get tight? Yup. But I always know what they’re up to! I can see and hear them!! lol
Do the kids fight? Yup. Good life lessons on forgiveness and grace.
Do I get tired? Yup. Helps me remember my need and dependence on Christ.
Would I trade it for all those fancy things and peace, quiet and a full nights sleep? No way.
My kids are now 17, 15 (almost 16), 13 (almost 14) and 11. I miss those mornings when my toddler crawled into bed with me. I miss snuggling with my newborn in the middle of the night. I miss it. I actually miss juggling an infant in one arm and a toddler on the other hip, both crying. Crazy huh?
And mom in the middle of it, you will someday miss it too believe it or not. You will.
So here are a few tips from a “seasoned” (that’s my way of saying older) mom:
- Daily bible devotions! Get your heart right first thing. Read verses to encourage your spirit. A few favorites: Is. 40:31, Phil. 4:4, Phil: 4:13, Phil. 4:19
- Surround yourself with good friends who will help you out. And not just other moms with little kids. Mistake! Find a good older friend. Someone who can encourage you and help you see the light at the end of the tunnel!
- Date night with the hubby. Spending time with just your man is sooo nice.
- Get out of the house! I loved going out with my best friend. Our kids were the same ages and it didn’t seem as daunting with a friend in tow. A trip to the park, a walk around the block, a small shopping trip to the mall…
- Don’t beat yourself up about the house. I found if I did a little bit each day, and had a system written down it helped me stay focused. Mopping on Fridays, Groceries on Tuesdays….etc. But it doesn’t have to be “Leave it to Beaver house” perfect!
- Nap time! A mom’s best friend. Don’t tell me they won’t nap. Make ‘em. Naps were my “mental salvation” during those baby years.
Wowzers this post has turned out long! My hope was to encourage all those moms like Katie that it is normal to feel that way. And hopefully encourage you to think on tomorrow not just focus on the turmoils of today.
‘Cause guess what? Those tiny, sweet, chubby faces grow up fast!
Related Posts:
Sewing Fun! A Sea Horse
| February 17, 2012 | Free patterns, Frugal Friday |
Don’t ask me why, ’cause I don’t know, but I have always been fascinated with the sea horse. They are so cute! When I was in college, I used to go to this pet store and my favorite thing to do was watch the sweet little sea horses. Anyway, I stitched up a fun little… more
Adding a Bit of Tangerine: A fun new wristlet purse
| February 2, 2012 | sewing projects |
Pantone announced that the new color for spring this year was to be tangerine, a.k.a orange. This is not my favorite color, but it does have some cheery appeal. My youngest truly loves the color orange and is now drooling over my new little purse. I opted to mix soft gray tones with a bit… more
Retro Betsy McCall Paper Dolls: Free Printables
| February 2, 2012 | Beautifully Vintage, child crafts, crafts, Thrifty Savings |
One of my favorite memories of first grade was when we had inside recess and I got to play with the paper dolls! They were old fashioned 1950′s style dolls that had been mounted onto card stock and I absolutely loved them. I adored all the pretty dresses and pretended I was the little paper… more
Way Back When Wednesday
| February 1, 2012 | Family fun |
Way back when they were littles…. Related Posts:No Related Posts more
Ideas for Small Spaces: Instant Entry Hall Sitting Nook
| January 31, 2012 | Posted by Karen under Ideas for small spaces, Pinterest |
Source: apartmenttherapy.com via Karen (Sew Determined) on Pinterest
I absolutely love this idea! Take the doors off the closet and turn it into a nook. Now of course in my house with 6 people it would probably never look like this, except if company was coming! But I love the idea. Pinterest gives such scope for the imagination….
Related Posts:
You Sew It! Easy Dress Pattern for the Cider Shabby Apple Dress
| January 30, 2012 | Posted by Karen under Easy patterns, Fashion, Super Cute Patterns, You Sew It |
The Cider dress from Shabby Apple was a tough one for me to find a matching pattern. I think the Vogue V8665 matches the dress style fairly close. I unfortunately couldn’t find one with a similar neck ruffle.
I found the fabric at Fashion Fabrics Club for $4.55 a yard! Now that’s cheap.
Want to know how to make a ruffle? I made one similar on my Coffee Date Dress. Instead of placing the ruffle down the front, you place it along the scoop neckline. You cut out Two strips of fabric 6″ wide and double the length of your neck line, making the bottom ruffle shorter. Serge or zig zag the long raw edges and fold over to make it thinner. Sew a basting stitch along the long length and pull to ruffle. Place it on the neck how you like
I hope you’ve been enjoying the You Sew It series. Happy Sewing! Got a dress you love? Let me know and I’ll try to find a pattern for it!
Related Posts:
Fabric Paper Doll Pattern
| January 29, 2012 | Posted by Karen under child crafts, Crafts, Free patterns, free patterns, Thrifty Savings |
While searching for dress patterns, I found this free fabric paper doll pattern with great instructions at Butterick! Super cute. And what little girl doesn’t love paper dolls?
To get the pattern, I had to enter my email and that was it. There were several other free patterns at Butterick as well.
Related Posts:
A Real Eye Opener! “How We Love” Book Review
| January 27, 2012 | Posted by Karen under Book Reviews |
I started reading this book with the thought, “Oh, another parenting book…” I have to say that this book, How We Love Our Kids by Milan and Kay Yerkovich, was an eye opener for me.
Have you ever had one of those “ah ha!!” moments? Well that’s what I had by the time I was into the third chapter. I honestly wish I would have read this book when I first got married 18 years ago! First off it’s not a how to get your kids to behave book, but more of a look into your personality and love style.
Honestly some of the examples given were like looking into a mirror. Eye opening would be an understatement. I saw things that were happening in my marriage and parenting that we have been battling for years and saw the “why’s” for the first time.
As a whole, I truly enjoyed reading this book and learned a tremendous amount. In fact, I’m going to have to re-read this a few times to get it to “sink” in. I do wish, however, there was more of a focus on the importance of prayer in the healing and growing. The authors did use scripture throughout the book, but the focus was not as strong as I personally would have preferred.
I would highly recommend this book for both parents and married couples alike. Be prepared to have your eyes opened ,face some tough things in your life and be willing to make changes that will improve your family and marriage. Definitely a good read.
I was given this book by Blogging for Books in exchange for an honest review. 
Related Posts:
You Sew It! Cute Pattern to Make the “About the Artist Dress”
| January 27, 2012 | Posted by Karen under Super Cute Patterns, Thrifty Savings, You Sew It |
I adore the ruffles on this pretty little dress from Modcloth sweetly named About the Artist.
I found this pattern in my ever growing stash! It’s a Simplicity Project Runway pattern 2403. I must have bought it on sale at Joanne’s or something and forgot about it. But after seeing this cute Modcloth dress, I think I have another summer project lined up. I’d love to make it now, but I’m so busy right now I don’t know which is up sometimes!
The ash Kona fabric is from Fabric.com and is only $5.48 a yard! Pick out some black bias trim and voila you have a super cute dress for summer.
Happy sewing! If you have a dress you would love to see mentioned, let me know!
